TINA V. TARA

TINA v. TARA isn’t another ‘cage match’ gimmick between two billionaire business people like ZUCKERBERG V. MUSK.  These are investment terms I’m borrowing to help you contemplate fixed versus flexible thinking and how this relates to change. 

TINA is the acronym for “There Is No Alternative” while TARA is the acronym for “There Are Reasonable Alternatives.”  As a coach, I notice TINA showing up in the thinking of many of my clients at the beginning of our work together.  People may contact me because they want to change jobs but “can’t.”  Or maybe they “can’t” retire until they are 65 or they “can’t” get a divorce at 57 or they’ll “never” find a partner that loves them or their adult children will “never” launch.  My role is to help them notice TINA and over time introduce them to TARA. 

One technique I learned in my training to help clients shift their thinking is known as the 3 B’s - Better it, Bag it or Barter it.  Let’s say that Sally isn’t enjoying her job, but TINA tells her she “has to stay.”  Perhaps Sally has been a proactive saver and has a good amount of money in her investment accounts and could “bag” the job and look for something more enjoyable. Maybe she doesn’t have the financial means to leave her current job, but she could find ways to make the job “better" by proposing a hybrid work schedule or four day work week. Perhaps there are specific responsibilities she loves and others she doesn’t and she could “barter" responsibilities to create a more interesting and engaging role for herself. 

3 B’s Technique

One technique I learned in my training to help shift thinking is known as the 3 B’s - Better it, Bag it or Barter it.

TINA gets in the way of people being able to bring about change.  Learning more about TARA (“There Are Reasonable Alternatives) and applying the 3 B’s is one way to help shift thinking. When someone sees possibilities and alternatives, it opens the door for change to occur.  

Ready to invest in yourself and take the first small step to bring about change?  Contact me today for a free consultation!

Reflection: How is TINA getting in the way to bring about change?  What thoughts do you notice or what stories are you telling yourself about something you “can’t do or have to do?” 

Action: Write down two or three of the top stories you notice you tell yourself and introduce TARA by applying the 3 B’s.  “There Are Reasonable Alternatives” - what are they?

Tool:  3 B’s - Better it, Barter it or Bag it!